Blues from the border line...

Amman, looking for Wally...

Hi people,

yeah, I know. Almost two month without news. The people can think that I left my blog forever... but nothing so far away from the reality.

The people who knows me good, and by fortune there're many of them, never can imagine how terrible I feel this winter, far away from home, without work , in a cold and desertic land, and in love ...again? of the wrong woman... no my god... maybe is the pasion of the lost causes that makes me do the things I do... or maybe something diferent, make up like stupidity. The people who knows me can remember how much I hate the cold... and the winter.

Anyway, the little trooper has back. I could have lost many things, but never my curiosity in the world we live, the world we walk, the world we love... and hate too.

What happened this last two months?... Can I explain in a post? ... No my dear, you have to be the 17th january in that wc, trying to hold the white line with your card to know it... I can only imagine two or three of you... you know who will be. You have to live that night with me to understand it... it's not so far away. Can you join to me?

Jordan is a strange place, sad, grey, and artificial. The people is good, but far away of our world. Exactly they live in the edges of it. A land of easy money, of consumism, of apareance, but empty of rights, empty of hopes... that we dont want to dream, there's here like a reality.

I like the arabs like themselves, not their society, nor their actitud toward the women (If I have to be woman, I have to be really stupid to be with an arab), but I like their actitude to the world, always expecting something better, but far away to sacrifice nothing to get it.

The israelis are diferent. Two times I visited that country in the last month... I have been really scared. The borders of the western world, the front line of the "modern democracies", the society of the wellfare cooked into the threat sauce and the oil of the hipocresy. A society reflex than ours, not so far away... how many things are you going to sacrifice to reach the total security? To carry guns in the streets is not for spanish, because the spanish let them to others (my friends of MCAN know that our security is in hands of the slime of the nation, anyway).

We create an unperfect system, full of contoversities, full of lies, full of hipocresy, but with the false hope that is the best we can reach, or (like the right people thinks) the less unfair of all the systems... what jerks are us...

The bombing and invasion of Gaza is not new. Only a step more, another lie more, another product of the mass media... how about Iugoslavia, Somalia, Guantanamo, Argelia, Haiti, Grenada, Cuba, Libia ... Iraq. Many bricks in our sistem to fix our world... or their world? Are we the same than the americans? Really? I dont think so... in the last years I've heard some of us blaming the americans, awakening of this stupid slumber we live, our leaders knows it and try to put the right icons to make us believe that europe has reached perfectly the postcapitalist world. All this is shit.

Europe is land of revolution. Of failed systems, yes, but a land where the future is a proyect, not an image. We're not americans, my god. I heard Ervin Nagy and Krisztina Horvath blame the USA, David Garcia dream about our conscience, Sebastian and Manuel Bretones discuse that the CCCP was not so grey, Toni Manya hates our fate like catalans but inside of him there's this hope we all mantain, Milda Bujanaite hates the cruelty and wish to pay it back with the same coin (I support it too), Paola Micali see how the mafia and Berlusconi eat all the good that exist in "our" island, Victor Sos dont like the greens, Leandre Messeguer blame them all, and Josep Braut laughing of them all :-)... Just make and focus our rage to see that we are not like them. Italians, french, germans, Spanish, Greeks, Lituanians, Polish, Slovenians, Catalans, Basques, Nordics, Portuguesse, Bulgarians, Hungarians, Romanians... we are many, diferent, and undoubhtely... europeans. Our diference that has separate for centuries makes us strong now... and only admiting it we can ellaborate a discuss enough to face the problems of the world, with justice and fair... not seeing it like a big market of our own.

I am really disapointed with the people of USA, I see them here like teenagers more interested in drink, fuck and became a rightfull piece of their system than in understand what is happening. No one of them is worth to be like the people I mentioned first. I know that they are in other plane of existence, but is really frustrating see the muslims (and the europeans) following their game. I hope the day they know that this world dont belong to them, than they can not move as freely as they can now... maybe this day they will learn how to respect the others... and the system they built too. Hizbullah, al quaeda, hamas... only names.

My experience in history (who of you can defy me in this?) show me that all the empires finally fall, and that there's people like us than likes to find the bricks to do it. Only we need people to believe in it... and act in consequence.

Land of hope?